When Mystical Creatures Attack! by Kathleen Founds

Author:Kathleen Founds [Founds, Kathleen]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
ISBN: 9781609382834
Publisher: University of Iowa Press
Published: 2014-10-01T07:00:00+00:00

Schizophrenics shuffled past, minds wrapped in terrible cocoons. Ms. Freedman didn’t seem to know what to do with her hands. “Do you have a cell phone?” she whispered.

I handed her my phone. Ms. Freedman held it to hear ear. “No, Gretchen,” she said, animated. “I can’t give you a better offer on the house.” Walking aggressively, she made a beeline for the door.

I moseyed up to Beardo at the front desk. “Can I sign us both out?” I asked. I nodded to Ms. Freedman, who had her back to us. “My girlfriend’s on an important phone call.”

Beardo gazed out the window at Ms. Freedman’s back. “You know,” he said. “Your girlfriend’s ankles remind me of Laura’s ankles. Such slender, delicate, ankles.”

“Your commentary seems inappropriate.”

“Is it alright if I step outside and say goodbye to—what was her name—Kristi Colimote? Beardo tucked the binder under his arm. “She really should sign the binder.”

“Sir,” I said, blocking his way. “It’s a very important phone call.”

Beardo stared me down. “Is it, Mexico Foxtrot?”

I blinked.

“Emilia,” Beardo called into the back room. “Situation 2.”

A rotund woman in pink scrubs emerged from the back room. “Situation 2,” she barked into the intercom. Classical music started up on the PA system.

I glanced behind me. Ms. Freedman was nowhere to be seen. I made a break for the front door. As I pushed it open, I shouted, “Run for it, Ms. F!”

“I’m going after him,” Beardo screamed, flinging himself at the door.

I sprinted down the red brick path, then veered left, into a courtyard filled with tiny fountains. I tore around a shed, Beardo’s footsteps pounding gravel behind me. I faked a right, then sprinted across a sand garden to the parking lot, jabbing my hand into my pocket for the keys. Beardo made a dive for my feet, pulled my ankles out from under me. “Where is she, you bastard?” he shouted, sitting on my back, wrenching my arm. “Where is she?” I raised my bleeding face and scanned the parking lot. Greebo’s car was gone.

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